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Merry Christmas 2014 from our family to yours…

A few weeks ago, our whole family went to the ocean. Three hotel rooms later, we gathered at the hotel pool. Scott and the kids love to swim. I am not a pool person. Especially in Bodega Bay where the fog rolls in thick and gray and cold. Snug in our sweaters, Oma and I watched from the lawn chairs, sitting beside an older gentleman who took a fancy to our family. “You don’t see big families like this anymore,” he said, torn between a smile and frown as Bicknell kids took over the hot tub after splashing the […]

By Paula November 30, 2014

When It Rains and A Week Goes By

When it rains… and it’s one of those weeks. You know those weeks… You have two dogs and one runs off and the other dog howls on the porch half the day. You think it’s the TV or the three-year-old making crazy wolf calls in the family room, but then you realize it’s your dog. Your broken-hearted dog laying in the rain howling out his loneliness. Please God, let that dog come home. If she doesn’t come home, we’ll lose both of them. Buck won’t make it without Nala. Our kids named these dogs, love these dogs, please bring Nala […]

By Paula November 22, 2014

Leaves and Grace

I just wanted to get the yard work done. The lawn needed mowing and leaves were in the way. So I handed our sons rakes. It didn’t take long for the boys to make a big pile in the grass. Satisfied, I brought them a wheelbarrow and told them what to do, then went back to my chores in the house. It was the shouts of joy that gave them away. I knew the leaves hadn’t made it to the burn pile. I finished folding the clothes in the dryer and walked to the kitchen window. Sure enough, leaves flew […]

By Paula November 18, 2014

I’ll Leave the Lights On

I hung the lights while you were gone. Three weeks early, but who’s counting Christmas cheer. Your dad was born in November and this is the month you’re burying him. Out in Arlington with the other soldiers. I hear the leaves blaze red in Virginia this time of year. Sure wish I was there with you. We’ve never buried a parent together. Never lost a parent until now. The house seemed dark after you left so I went to the garage and dug out the lights. You’re leaving on a jet plane. Actually, you’ve already left, but I like that […]

By Paula November 12, 2014

I’ll Just Stay Home, Thanks!

If you look at this photo closely, you’ll learn something small about me that’s not so small. It’s actually a part of who I am. Notice the price tag on the bottom of my boot. This is really the story of my life. I’ve never had it all together. Not once. I am not a together person. But I did get the boots on sale, a really good spring sale at Nordstrom’s Rack. I go there once a year, okay maybe twice a year, but my hunt at the Rack is all about the boots. I love boots. I could […]

By Paula November 3, 2014

You Are Not Awesome, But You Are Loved

“I’m a good person. I believe in God. Why wouldn’t I go to heaven?” “You are not a good person, you are a sinner in need of a savior.” I remember the day I told my friend this, and he didn’t take it so well. Later, my friend came to know Jesus and agreed with me that “Nobody is good but God alone,” Mark 10:18. He arrived at this conclusion because he read it for himself in the Bible. Since then, I’ve repeated this scripture to many people, including myself because we all need a reality check from time to […]

By Paula October 28, 2014

Talking truth to yourself

You’re too old for this! Are you kidding me? You’re chasing a toddler around these office buildings like an idiot. You used to interview people in places like this. Write stories people actually read and liked and respected you for when you had a real job. Now people think you’ve gone nuts. You’re the crazy lady with all those crazy kids. The voice in my head won’t shut up as I run past windows where people are working at their desks. Hopefully everyone looking at their computers and not out their windows as Cruz and I streak by on the sidewalk. […]

By Paula October 20, 2014