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Worn out Christians

We’re working at getting 10 month old Cruz to sleep through the night. His normal routine is snooze a few hours, nurse, snooze, nurse, snooze all night long. After nearly a year of only a few hours of sleep at a stretch, I’m worn out. Last night I put my foot down. Nursed Cruz at 11 pm, then did not pick him up again until 5 am. Scott took the night shift, and all of us listened to Cruz wail on and off until morning. Today I’m worn out. And not just physically. Spiritually, I’m tired. Tired of the broken church. Broken marriages. Broken parents. […]

By Paula January 27, 2012

I’m Getting Happy

Last week G2 got in trouble. Dad sent him to his room where he pouted in a chair. Feeling bad for him, I grabbed a children’s prayer book and sat down beside him. One prayer, then two, three, four… on we read and prayed. About halfway through the book, G2 looked up at me. “I’m getting happy,” he said with wonder on his precious little face. I was getting happy, too. A few days after G2’s trouble, our eighteen-year-old daughter got in a car accident. She’s all right, but her car is now in the shop. Just days earlier, she bought this car. The night […]

By Paula January 19, 2012

The Thorn

I’ve had a thorn in my foot since this summer. It lodged in

By Paula January 13, 2012

The Jesus Piece

For Christmas nine month old Cruz (my nickname for little man) got one of those toddler toys where pieces fit into the holes. The shapes are all different: square, star, round, heart, etc. Cruz likes to crawl around carrying a piece in his hand. The toy that holds the pieces is often abandoned on the rug, but one little shape is packed all over the house. Cruz thinks he can stick it anywhere, even the dog’s ear. He’s a determined boy and the dog does her best to avoid him because that piece does not fit a dog’s ear. I’ve been told that I often come […]

By Paula January 6, 2012

Gotta Get My Crazy Out

Several Sundays ago Scott retrieved our boys from Bible class. Racing out onto the church lawn, six- year-old Joey headed straight for our Suburban in the parking lot at the edge of the grass and leaped onto the back bumper. He jumped up and down for a moment, shaking the car, then ran to the front of the vehicle and climbed onto the hood. Joey was in the process of scaling the front windshield when Scott yelled, “Joey you’re freaking out. Get off the car!” “I gotta get my crazy out!” Joey hollered back. “Get off the car, Joey. Now.” “Dad, I’ve been in church […]

By Paula November 18, 2011

Amazing Grace

May 1989: our honeymoon. Driving through San Francisco we decide to walk the wharf. The day is bright and sunny, warm for the city by the bay. “Let’s get you a wedding present,” says Scott, knowing picking out a gift together will delight me. At Pier 39, we pop into a music box store. There it is. The perfect wedding gift from a husband to his bride: a white, wooden, laminated music box made in Italy. “Select your song for the box,” says the man behind the counter.“Do you have The Rose I ask. Our wedding song.“Nope, don’t have that one.” The […]

By Paula November 10, 2011

A Toddler on the Highway

Five years ago driving up Highway 20 while towing a horse trailer, we came upon a toddler standing along the interstate. The child was all alone watching the traffic roar along. A steady line of vehicles zoomed so close to the tot that his hair and clothes blew in the wind of their passing. “Was that a little boy by the road?” Scott stepped on the breaks to slow down. When you have a trailer full of horses, the last thing you want to do is stop on a dime. Whipping my head around to look in the rearview mirror, I gasped. “He’s about two-years-old. You have […]

By Paula November 4, 2011